On a Receipt

by Nelson Gatlin

supported by
Elizabeth Hagen
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Elizabeth Hagen This entire album is a genuine outpouring of Nelson's soul through amazing musical talent. There is no purer music than what he has recorded for this, and no better musician to support. Favorite track: The Last Weekend.
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about

"On a Receipt" is a full-length album of bedroom recordings by Nelson Gatlin.

All songs written between 2012 and now, "On a Receipt" is audio heartbreak, remembering the worst and the whatever.

credits

released June 10, 2014

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all rights reserved

about

Nelson Gatlin Foley, Alabama

Nelson Gatlin is a musician from Foley AL.

I write songs about things that I am going through or things that I have been through.

I also produce music under the name AGGRESSOR.
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Track Name: Skinned Knees
I've been talking about myself / I can't talk about much else
And it feels good, your love / Leaves me, wanting more
I'm dreaming of moving somewhere else

We're all talking about the time / That night I lost my mind
Drinking, too fast / I broke my favorite shot glass
Please stop telling lies / That night I got too high,
And wanted to end my own life
Will I ever learn?
Don't worry about me.

It's time to put the book back on the shelf
It's about time I ask for help
You've got your family / I've got skinned knees
It's time I left and didn't come home
But you know I won't

It's time I saw someone else
I'm sick of writing about myself
Feeling so cold / All the warmth Miami stole
There's someone who thinks I'm great / I drowned her in Montego Bay
The last thing I deserve is someone new
Feeling alone is sacred and all I know
Starving for comfort never ends,
Though I'm in love with all my friends / I'm in love with all my friends
Please help me to breath
Or leave me here to drown

You were everything to me
Track Name: The Last Weekend
This is the last weekend / that I will ever live
I'm dying to see it end
Spent the day in my bed / wish I could sleep instead
I'm waiting until the end.

This is the first weekend / that I should feel so alone
I don't think it will ever end
It's just a one-way plane / get on the runway, love
I love you more than I can stand

Knife cuts through the window / Knife cuts through the air
Knife cuts through your pictures at which I stare

I'm ready to forgive / My heart is broken, but I don't care
I just hope that you are well
Spent the day in my head / cried more than I've slept
I'm so confused and mostly scared

Silence cuts through the mirror / Silence rips me apart
Your silence cuts to the bottom of my aching heart
Track Name: Jerry Only Knows
You were high on crack cocaine / with Jerry Only
In those days I was feeling pretty lonely
and I realized that I / was an agent of the estranged
My eyes were red from every word I'd read
My eyes were red

I was drunk up on the stage / and some were listening
I've been dreaming all my life / of a thousand eyes glistening
As I walk upon the stone / and pray to my jury of captives, who
Know my songs and sing along,
Please sing along

I was passed out on the couch / with friendly faces
In a manic state for weeks / I was happy and I was going places
Until I felt alone that night / a ghost, wrecked, miserable sight
Saved by a friend, I'm so sorry,
I will change again

I was trying to break your heart / and you weren't helping
I couldn't keep myself from tears
But you were only empty
You didn't say anything

I wanted to jump from this stage / to my death
But I was saved
Yeah, I guess that I was saved
I'm sorry I get that way

- I guess things aren't so bad,
But honestly, I'm tired of sleeping and sleeping alone.
Track Name: Beach Song
And I'm alone again / 3AM and I'm still living
These old crutches will kill me / if only I'd let them
I let the night sleep / if only I could keep it
My heart sunk an hour ago / like the lights on the water

The beach is quiet now / like I'm trying to be
I wish she was here right now / I'm sure she'd listen to me

Sometimes the ocean beckons me / I pretend that I can't swim
Her hymns only depress me / with caresses cold and grim
But I'm sailing all the time / I'm with her in my mind
She loves me more than life / but life's not worth my time

And I will live alone / long enough to feel her here
Much like all the years, the years

Two miles due south
I threw away my reason
Tossed it to the water
and let it drown

Maybe I should put my drink down / and retire like the others
But my mind is running miles now / and tears nearly come

I know I'll be alone / at least til late morning comes
but I won't turn out the lights for a while

This summer I'll jump off the edge / I'll fall in love again
Will it be worth it in the end?
Track Name: I'll Trade My Bones for Rust
I left it all to trust
I'll trade my bones for rust
If that is what you want,
Then it's what I'll give

Because I,
I want to know

What you're thinking now
I'll love you anyhow
Do you want to drop out?
Just hear me out.

Because I,
I want you
Track Name: A Picture of the Clouds
On the day that I left, you spoke to me in rhythm
I heard songs in your heartbreak and I wrote them in my notebook
And on the day I said goodbye, I spoke to you in anger
I said I will not waste my time with you

When I boarded my flight, I could feel my hands still shaking
Surrounded by handsome strangers, I'd taken out my camera for
A picture of the clouds, miles above the earth and lonely
It reminds me I'm a bastard and a killer

-

But don't talk to me like I am still fucked up in apartments
where my friends drink themselves to death
I spend each day searching for a meaningful connection
Like the one that I thought we had before I realized that I was dreaming
Now I'm terrified of giving everyone what I gave you;
A proper burial, with all of your favorite flowers
And words that you'd long ago made empty
Track Name: Left
I dream of sharks at the end of the pier;
Sweetness, I'm not a poet, I'm a prophet, dear
Perfect, I'm not angry I can't have my way
It's just rain on a miserable day

I dreamt of a grey lake underground
I heard the dead whisper in my ear
If anything I'm alone here
If anything, I'm alone

And my tears / fall down
And disappear / before they reach the ground

I felt an ocean drown out my sighs
Sweetness, the deepest blue is pouring from your eyes
Perfect, I could feel you after every breath
Would I could feel you until my death

And a doe / soft brown
Bullet strikes / fall to the ground
And my fears / never drown
Deep blue fades / without a sound
Track Name: The Soft Light
I chose the longest route back home
Steer from the lights and pass them on
It's late and dark and I'm alone

Fly past the trees on windy hill
The moon sees the leaves are moving still
Symbol of life, talk me to my death

Under the streetlamps I'm too pale
They're daunting and grim but bright as hell
Shiners of light, lead me to the dark

I wish for the clouds to fall down
And hold me close until I drown
The rain will fall, and so will I

Stormy night, sing me to sleep
In my dreams, she's mine to keep
The soft light, the soft warmth,
around us
She and I will sleep together

I'm shaking in fear from my shadow
It lays in the dark along the road
As I run, I'm out of breath; and I smile

When I was young I held a knife
Was it mercy to save my life?
I let it all die as the years passed by

Stormy night, sing me to sleep
In my dreams, she's mine to keep
The soft light, the soft warmth,
around us
She and I will sleep forever
Track Name: Big Alone
On the way back home, I found my mother's Big Alone
Driving faster than I'd ever dared, I wasn't scared
to crash that night, in my car, I was taking turns like a superstar
- If I could make it there, when I grow up
Because living's alright, but dying is okay too;
I felt like you could outlive the memory of me

On the way back home, I found comfort in your tone
I'm alright, everything is alright
It's been years since that night
And I've discovered that this ocean on my mind
And the Big Alone I've inherited is not mine

What cover for my naive eyes
and this Garden under my nose

I had a dream last night
You said, "Now's your chance or Goodbye"
...
but when I woke, you were still there
I was breathing the tangles in your hair
I had this dream last night
Now's your chance or Goodbye
Now's your chance or Goodbye
Track Name: I Want to Smile
Took so long to make it home / was such a foggy night

I want to speak in tongues for the rest of my life
I am so inspired
I'm sick of speaking my mind like anyone can hear
my words, like I am heard
Over the sound of my mistakes

I lose my train of thought ..

Where's my muse? No more blue
I want to sing poetry / I want to sing beautifully
I don't want to sing open wounds
I want to smile; I want to make you...

Where's my muse? No more blue
I want to run for miles / I want to run

I was hanging on last night
With my head to the ground and my feet upside

I want to hang around for the rest of my life,
but I fell and hit the ground
stood up, brushed off, and looked around
I was lucky that no one saw me

So I guess I'll speak more riddles like anyone can hear
my voice, like I am heard, over the sound of a talking crowd.
Track Name: Haunted
Sycophants climb over the dead just to get to where I am
The Liar's game, dressed in red and shame
I don't play that way
I was two weeks late for my own trial
But I passed in style

Talking to strangers in a bar I'd never been before
About how the moon falls around the Earth
Like how I fall around my words
And I'd felt for once like I had the brains
To make someone proud

I feel you, man
Out there on your own
Moonlight shines on farmhouses and summer fields
My hand is clenched tight around my knife
As I walk my road, I am followed back home

I am haunted by you
and your spotted red dress
Those pearls around your neck
Your dimpled chin, silver-blue eyes
Long dark hair and pleasure sighs

And I know, I'm probably not your kind
I'm not handsome or fine
I don't shut up like a man;
I talk too much
With my bleeding heart out in my hands
I'm a leader, with a quiet voice, unheard
You'll never hear a word

They'd rather be sleeping
And I'd rather fall down sideways

Fall down sideways, into my head
talk myself to sleep
and dream of you

Fall down sideways, into those pools
Where I will drown
never to wake up

No offense, I want you out of my head
I kind of like where I am
The fighter's game, dress up in my name
I don't want to play anymore
Because I'd felt for once like I had the brains
To make myself proud